Here it is again. Another opportunity to learn something about knowing and not knowing. And about sharing or not sharing what no one else in the circle sees. Do I tell them what I see? And when they reject the telling, do I tell them again, anyway, push, insist? Or let it go?
The ground is vibrating. I feel a tremor. We must leave this place.
No one else feels it. Do I move to a safer place and leave them to be swallowed up when the ground cracks open?
People here in Holly Springs MS have many reasons not to listen to me. To reject my observations and suggestions. Many "white" people are unaccustomed to listening to "black" people and I am black. I am not "from here" and many native residents discount all observations by "outsiders." I have gray hair; some folks younger than me see gray hair as incontrovertible evidence I'm out of touch with what's happening Now. And, of course, there are men who don't listen to women; some are especially dismissive of women who don't wear makeup and standard issue "girl clothes."
What I strive for, still, after all these years, is to fulfill what seems a compassionate obligation -- to share what I think I see; to summon the courageous humility necessary to persevere beyond my comfort level, to speak even in the face of rejection borne of ignorance; and then...to let it go. As the AA crowd puts it "Let go and let God." Let Time. Let things unfold as they will.